The Macho Pole
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Friday, December 10

I’ve been in Mexico now about a month and a half although I haven’t crossed the border yet.  These past four months were pretty tough on the psyche so I mentally started vacation early.  Today Sharon and I made it official by leaving San Antonio just before noon with a target well south of the border.

You know those big orange construction barrels that the workers put out to make hazards obvious? Well I took that hazard out by completely annihilating it.  Construction guy had one job; to put the barrels out.  I guess he missed that day of training where you fill them with water or sand so it would stay in place.  It was no match for the draft caused by the 18 wheeler in front of me. And this was just barely after we crossed the border.  This was just prepping us for Sharon’s 10 mile wrong turn and the 30 minute traffic jam caused by something invisible.

The Las Palmas Midway Hotel

Matehuala is just far enough to make you feel like you’ve gotten some decent miles behind you but not so far as to make you feel beat to pavement pulp.  We stopped in our favorite and funky hotel, Las Palmas Midway.  This is an extremely well-kept roadside hotel that would be an appropriate setting for an episode of “I Love Lucy”.  Want more info on this hotel, see earlier posts like The Matehuala Wal Mart or Chasing the Dream.  We’ve stopped here so much we feel that we should be brand ambassadors.  Gringo spokes peoples. 

Saturday, December 11

We left Matehuala rather early only to make a U-turn back to Las Palmas.  I needed their Wifi to look up our hotel in Guanajuato and to download some podcasts for the drive.  The drive was nice but rather uneventful. It should be noted however that upon entering Guanajuato one should NOT miss a turn when one is instructed to turn.  Guanajuato is a maze of above ground and below ground one-way “streets” that vary in width from super narrow to “I didn’t need those side mirrors anyway” narrow.  I’ve seen wider sidewalks.  Heck, I’ve seen wider fettuccini.  Besides squeezing between buildings the drive also includes steep inclines, speed bumps, small children and an occasional burro.

After about an hour of “missing the turn” we parked in a lot and hiked to the hotel.  Most of the hotels here don’t come with on-site parking and we were prepared for such a situation.  Load a backpack, grab some pesos and leave everything else in the car.

This was outside our window

Our Guanajuato hotel was small but tall. It was 4 stories of stairs and don’t ‘cha just know we love stairs after walking through a town of steepness and high altitude.  Somehow we acquired the only room with a balcony, (4th floor) with a great view along with plenty of light, noise, fireworks, church bells, loud dogs, sirens, borrachos and the occasional Spanish argument. Still, we love this town.  We got pizza at one of our favorite restaurants, achieved a decent wine buzz and sauntered back to the small and tall with spotty memories of the evenings events.

Sunday, December 12

“Um,” was the first word from Sharon this morning.  “I think I left my purse at the restaurant.”

“Hmmm” was Donnie’s first word.  “Are you… Hmmm”.  You know.  Why state the obvious.

Sharon was calm about the situation so I tried to follow her lead.  The restaurant wouldn’t open for several hours so…. On with our plans.  To quote Alfred E Neuman, “What? Me worry?”

Today is the reason we wanted to come to Guanajuato.  For us the way Guanajuato celebrates Our Lady of Guadalupe Day is an unforgettable cultural experience.  This is the second most important religious holiday, only out done by Semana Santa; Easter week.

We started the “lost purse” morning by walking the trail to the church and checking out their set up.  The crowds haven’t formed yet.  So back down the hill into centro we caught the loud and long parade that would make the same trek we just finished.  The parade was mostly drums.  Hundreds of drums.  Then sprinkle in some questionable bugle playing.  You know.  Just enough to cover up the dog howling.

Short History: Today in 1531 Mary appears to Juan Diego.  They have some conversation, maybe breakfast tacos.  Juan tells the church about what he saw but, hey, those Catholics.  They need proof and no one has suffered enough yet.  So repeat 3 more times but on the last visit Mary has Juan pick some roses and carry them in his tunic back to those stubborn priests.   Voilá, err… Órale! There in the tunic is the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe.  If you want the details on this just click HERE.   

We decided we needed a post parade nap and possible adult activities, like Scrabble.  Back in the small and tall while I was attempting a double word score, someone discovered a purse that looks quite similar to Sharon’s.  And it happened to be under Sharon’s pillow.  And it happened to be the pillow her cute little head was on all night.  We had a pretty good laugh at this.  We blew off the Scrabble game and whipped out the Pokemon cards.

So today, among other things, parents dress their kids up like Mary and Juan Diego.  The little girls get all fancy and depict Mary.  The boys are Juan Diego in traditional campesino garb.  No matter how young, all the boys get mustaches and maybe some sideburns.  The families squeeze into a cramped street carrying offerings of vegetables and eggs up to a church atop the hill.  Along the mile route the street is lined with vendors.  Outside the church there is a grand festival with live music, ethnic dances and the “macho pole”.  I don’t really know what it’s called but I’m going to copyright that one.  It’s a telephone pole firmly planted in the ground. Atop the pole 20 to 25 feet up are prizes; 6 cases of beer and 6 bottles of tequila or mescal.  If you can climb the pole, you can have it ALL. 

One key detail is the pole is coated with axel grease.  Some guys will do anything for a bunch of booze. Probably sponsored by “Gojo”, Natual de naranja Suave Limpiador de manos. Available at a store near you.

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9 thoughts on “The Macho Pole

  1. I probably enjoy your travels Almost as much as you do, especially the way you tell it! There are a few questions about the macho pole though… Does the macho-est man have to get the prizes down himself? Hopefully, not. And did the poor guy who fell off the pole survive?

    1. Yes! I got lazy but do have video of “el champion”. He and his soiled buddies got to keep everything. It wasn’t the guy who fell. But he eventually stood up laughing and proud and probably a bit sore.

  2. This is the first time I’ve read one of your posts…what a treat! Totally entertaining way with words and tales of (mis)adventures. Next time y’all go, I’ll carry your luggage and you just go on ahead.

  3. Y’all are so Incredible!! Love following your travel. I must say I have always wanted to go to Guanajuato…wish I was there with y’all! Thanks for sharing the FUN!!

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